CIX

People can want what they can’t have.

They’re entitled to, sure.

But they still can’t have it.

And that’s the truth.

[Image: Pinterest]

CVII

There’s more than one way to convince yourself you’re not who you thought you were. And you’re not as good as you wanted to be. And you don’t deserve all the things you’ve been given. And you’re not enough to do the things you need to do.

I can think of many ways, in fact.

And I have tried them all. 

Yet I am still here. And my heart is still beating. And the blood still runs hot in my veins.

There’s more than one way to convince yourself that you are nothing. And yet I’m still here, and I am something, and even I cant think that thought away.

I can write words, and they can have meaning, and I can string these sentences together and tell you something more than meaning and more than words and more than what you expected. But where is the meaning in that? And where is the meaning in me. And why. I don’t know how to write between these questions swelling my mind to too-big-a-size. And its not loftiness, its not loneliness, its not letting-myself-go or locking-you-out. It just me. And they’re in my mind. And I can’t banish them if I try so why die trying. Answer the questions and maybe the words with their sense can enter in not just to the pages but to the recesses of my soul. Healing words healing the healer. Not just the patient. Not just the broken. Not just the weary. Not just the forgotten and the forlorn and the downtrodden. But healing me.

I am none of those things but I am real, and I am here.

"And my soul will hang on every word you say..."

[Image: Pinterest]

XCI

Let yourself be seen.

I can’t.

Let yourself be seen.

I can’t.

Let yourself be seen.

I can’t.

Let yourself be seen.

What if…?

Let yourself be seen.

Fear does not become you, darling.

Words are more than weapons, dear.

You were not made to hide, my love.

Let yourself be seen.

[Image: Pinterest]

LXXXI

Lover of my soul.

Even when I don’t know you know. Even when I don’t hear me you hear me. You hear me when I don’t speak and when my heart sings. When my heart beats and my ears ring and my mind's lost and my souls clinging. You hear me. You hear the me in me. You see the you in me. I can't see but you see me and I can't think but your thoughts are of me and I can't breath but you breath into me the best of me and the most of me and the you in me.  You beat in me. Your beat in me is more of me than any else of me or he or she. You're doing a work in me. My heart sees. My heart beats. You're doing a work in me.

[Images: Pinterest]

LXXII

ANONYMOUS PT II.

Did I mention Zulu & Zephyr? Did I mention the gaze.

There's something about product editorials such as this - there's an anonymity, a focus on the product, yes, but also an element of 'you could be this girl' and 'this could be your world' and 'this should be your world' and 'you should be this girl' that is both incredibly artistic, truly captivating, and very effective marketing. 

But you can't just construct this kind of gaze, if it is contrived it doesn't work. These photographs simply work in their simplicity, their effortlessness, and that Australian nonchalance I mentioned. 

This could be me. This could be my world. 

[Photos from Zulu & Zephyr]

XLIV

Lovers Anonymous.

[Images: OracleFox, FashionGoneRogue]

XII

- Anonymous.